I am going to tell you a little secret about myself: I hoard stationery.
I have cabinets and boxes packed with greeting cards, journals, notebooks, notecards. I have supported the murder of so many trees.
You are more likely to get a hand-written thank you note or card letting you know I think you did a bang-up job. When someone sends me a card, I know how special it makes me feel. So, I like to do the same for others.
My dream: to go to the National Stationery Show in New York City. (I’m getting goose bumps just thinking about all of the pens, paper, box sets…)
I am also obsessed with dogs. Mine. Yours. All of them.
You will find me yelling at the Iowa Hawkeye football team most fall Saturdays.
And, I have three siblings. I always have been and always will be the favorite. (I don’t know this for a fact. But I still ask my mom regularly about her favorite child. She still picks the dog.)
These are things I should share when someone asks me who I am. Instead, I usually answer with what I do for a living. Instead of my career being a part of who I am, I answer as if it is all there is to me.
I’m sure people care and are interested in my career, but like so many other people, I treat it as though that’s all there is to me. You only get to know the cool, fun stuff that makes me unique and far more interesting if you know how to unlock that magical next layer of conversation.
You Are More Than Your Job
I have this theory that if we started talking more about the other parts of our lives, then we might identify with them more. Meaning: if you introduce yourself as someone other than ‘Midge, the Queen of Spreadsheets at Boringville Inc.,’ you might start thinking less about your job and more about your whole being.
Being consumed by our jobs is so easy. We spend a lot of time working, thinking about work, and trying not to think about work. (This goes for Stay-at-Home Parents, too. Your job is raising your children.)
Would it help you to reconnect with the different aspects of your life if you talked about them more with others? When was the last time you talked about your hobby? What you do for fun? Your desire to learn something new? Any aspect of your life other than your job or your children?
The less we talk about these things, the less we may identify with them, remember to incorporate them into our daily life, or feel like they connect to our personality.
No One Cares About My Interests Or Hobbies
I learned a long time ago one of two things about this statement is true:
- I am surrounded by the wrong people.
- I don’t talk about my interests and hobbies in an engaging manner.
A third possibility, if you have kids, is that nothing about you is cool. So, they aren’t really a fair litmus test.
Other people do care about your interests and hobbies. And, it’s likely that if you never talk about them, you may have surrounded yourself with people that don’t share the same interests as you. So, it shouldn’t be that surprising that they aren’t fascinated with the intricacies of building a World War II fighter plane out of popsicle sticks.
I can guarantee you that if you looked around and opened up your social circle a wee bit more, you find other beings that want to hear every last juicy detail of your latest model build.
Somewhere along the way, you forgot that you also need to connect with people who share your personal interests – not just your professional.
What Does This Have to Do With Burnout?
Everything.
Part of the burnout experience is isolation. You isolate yourself from people because you are exhausted and stressed out. Part of the reason you became exhausted and stressed out is that you allowed your job to become your whole sense of self. There was nothing else to balance it out or help you to refocus your time and energy.
You disconnected from your hobbies and interests, so now you don’t even remember what you used to love doing for fun.
If you have been talking about them and sharing them with others, they may have remained connected to you rather than being forgotten.
But I Don’t Have Any Hobbies
So often I hear from others that they don’t have any hobbies and aren’t even sure what they are interested in anymore. I felt the same way!
The best piece of advice I can give you when it comes to this issue: start trying things. Get out and start experiencing life. You will literally have no idea of what you are interested in unless you start trying out different things.
- Sign yourself up for classes
- Take a walk through a craft store
- Read
- Write
- Think about what you loved doing as a kid
- When was the last time you got excited about doing something?
- Volunteer
- Spend some time thinking
- What is an activity you have always wanted to try?
- Where is a place you have always wanted to visit?
There are so many opportunities for inspiration – you just have to start trying them. You may have more failures than you have successes. It’s supposed to work that way…
Things I gave a whirl that didn’t work out:
- Weighlifting
- Bike riding
- Yoga (I still don’t know why this didn’t work out because I like Pilates.)
- Cooking/baking
- Classes in art history, coding, investing
- Samba dancing lessons
- Video games (I am super sad about this one.)
- Watching and/or playing soccer
- Cats
There are still several things on my list that I still want to experience and have no idea if I will enjoy them.
I would challenge you to make a list of things you would like to try, but have no idea if you would enjoy. Activities that have absolutely nothing to do with your professional life.
This will not only help round you out as a person, but you will get so much energy and creativity when you use your mind and body for something other than your chosen career path. You might find a renewed energy in your job because you see it from a different perspective. And, you might also see yourself in a different light, as well.
